Solo Travel Archives - Mom's Guide To Travel

Jun 18 2018

Solo Travel for Moms: How Moms Can Use Travel for Self-Care

Solo travel is truly a self-care remedy for tired mothers. It is a time when moms can enjoy concentrated holistic self-care that puts them first. I’m a firm believer that solo travel can do wonders for us mentally, physically and spiritually.

Let me tell you why.

Using solo travel for self-care

If you think about it, solo travel is a form of respite.

When there are no demands on your attention or your time, you have an opportunity to focus on YOU.

You can do things that you love or that you’d love to try but never have the time (think calypso or merengue lessons).
You can arrange pampering time for yourself and take as long as you need.
You can spend time decompressing via long walks, meditation, or physical activities like yoga.

The ultimate goal is to refill your drained cup.

Taking periodic self-care travel breaks has helped me return home feeling 100%. I come back a better woman for my family because I’m renewed, refreshed, and replenished by the experience.

Activities like taking quiet walks on the beach, hiking to a waterfall, relaxing on a sailboat, touring an art museum, wine tasting at a vineyard, sleeping by the pool, surrendering in a spa, exploring on a food tour, or simply sitting quietly on a deck contribute to that renewal.

Because I see travel as a necessity for my self-care instead of a luxury, I prioritize it. If you can also see travel this way, it will help you to justify why you need solo breaks as well.

What about childcare?

Figuring out childcare is not easy for most moms with younger children or school-aged kids. It takes A LOT of coordination.

And although it can be difficult, it’s necessary if you want to make your solo travel dreams a reality.

How to do Solo Travel if You’re Married with children

If you’re married, you have to negotiate with your spouse. I am always negotiating with my husband…like several times a week!

Here’s what I mean specifically:

Be proactive with the calendars. Check his calendar, your calendar, and the kids’ school calendar. Coordinate where you can find synergy and make an opening for yourself to slip away.
If you take a solo trip, encourage him to do the same. If you go on a girlfriends’ getaway, encourage him to go on a guys’ trip.

Solo travel tips for single ladies

If you don’t have a spouse, partner, or are dealing with constraints with a significant other, then you may need to call in the troops.

Don’t be afraid to add family who live nearby to the equation. Ask them for a favor.

We often fly in my mother-in-law up to watch the kids. In the past, I’ve dropped off my boys with my sister in New York or we’ve even had my brother-in-law watch the children.

One of the single ladies who traveled with me to Costa Rica shared a great piece of advice for moms who can’t count on a spouse or family members: do a swap with a close friend!

I love this idea.

Identify a friend who you’d feel comfortable leaving your children with for an overnight or for a few days.

Set up an arrangement whereby you all swap watching each other’s children so that you can each get time away.

Talk about a win-win situation.

You’re getting a timeout and you’re also providing that gift to a friend as well.

Bottom line: if you want your solo travel plans to work you have to get creative. Not having a spouse, nanny, or family member nearby doesn’t have to kill the dream!

More creative ideas to help moms travel solo

If the budget allows, consider using sites like Care.com or check out nanny services for short-term or temporary nannies.

Work your way up to leaving your children with your providers for longer periods of time.

If you’re concerned with leaving them with someone you don’t know, this is where that pre-planning comes into play.

This strategy has to be set in motion way ahead of your intended travels in order for it to work. Leaving your children with someone other than a family member or friend takes a leap of faith.

If you have the resources, set up a camera in your home to keep an eye on things.

My Vivint home security system has an in-home camera option. You can also use Amazon’s Cloud camera security system which essentially does the same thing.

Most interior cameras are connected to apps on your phone where you can monitor from abroad and communicate with your family.

How to Take the First Step to Solo Travel for Self-Care

Start where you feel most comfortable. You want to start where things feel the easiest for you.

This can depend heavily on your resources or what’s available to you: time, money, and childcare.

A first step for the newbie solo traveler

Find an amazing property in your own city if you want to start locally. Then when you’re ready, stay overnight in a city a few hours away.

If you live in Maryland you may be interested in these relaxing things to do in Hagerstown Maryland.

Work your way up from there to another state, another region, another country, or another time zone.

Pushing yourself to go further for longer periods of time is called flexing your travel muscle.

You need to flex it for yourself and stretch it for your family until it becomes a strong habit.

Does your solo trip have to be totally solo?

Moms Travel Solo Girlfriend Getaway — Me and one of my Retreat attendees at a wine tasting in Spain.

That’s a good question to ask yourself. What does solo travel mean?

Within the context of family travel, I believe solo travel is a little broader than just traveling by yourself. I personally interpret it as traveling without your spouse or your kids.

For a mom, solo self-care travel can mean traveling completely by yourself or traveling with a friend or traveling with a group of like-minded women.

Part of my job is to empower you to be comfortable with any one of these options and do the coordinating for you.

I enjoy watching the transformation that happens when I take a group of women who are ready to flex their travel muscles on a retreat or a getaway.

Our goals are to always have fun and focus on our self-care.

Whatever way you define solo travel, those should be a couple of your goals as well. Download the FREE Solo Mom Getaway ebook version of this blog post to get a copy of a travel goal-setting worksheet:

Download Ebook

Self-care travel is about investing in yourself

As moms, we need to invest in our self-care. If we can do a better job at looking at self-care travel as an investment, the decision-making process would be a lot easier.

How is self-care travel an investment?

There is a return and there is a pay-off. The return is a renewed YOU.

The payoff is the benefit a renewed you offers to those around you. This could include your children, your spouse, your team or your employees.

Actionable Solo Travel Planning Steps for Moms

Moms Travel Solo Greece — Traveling in Greece.

The best way to get started is to set a goal for yourself.

We’re going to set your travel goals using a framework called G.O.S.T: Goals, Objectives, Strategy, and Tactics

I first learned about this framework from Sean Jackson of The Digital Entrepreneur podcast. It’s a very useful framework to help you keep things simple.

So this is how we will start: Decide on your G, your travel goal. This is where you are going to decide the who, what, and where of your solo travel goal.

For example, your goal could be to go on a solo luxury spa getaway weekend within driving distance. #TravelGoals

Are you traveling solo, with a friend or with a group?
Will you travel overnight, for 2 days, for a long weekend, for the week?
Will you travel by car, train, boat or plane?
What city, state, region, country do you want to explore?

Let’s consider your O, your objective. This is when you put a measurable detail on your goal, basically a metric of sorts.

Will you go on that solo trip in August of this year?
Determine how much you’re willing to spend on your solo self-care trip. If there’s no limit, even better. One less thing to worry about it.

S is your strategy. This is where you decide how this is all going to work.

Do you need to negotiate with your husband, partner or another family member?
You may need to go during a time of year where you kids are occupied in school and on a schedule.
You may need to travel when your kids are out of school and you can drop them off to someone’s house to watch them until you return.

And lastly, the T stands for your tactics. Essentially, this is your To Do List. Here is where you break down all the things you have to do to set your strategy in motion.

Remember, your strategy supports your objective which helps you to reach your travel goal. Here’s what part of that list might look like:

Give yourself permission to invest in your self-care.
Check the kids’ school calendar.
Check your spouse’s calendar.
Call mom to see if she is available to watch the kids.
Check times and prices of flights.
Sign up for a group retreat.

This is where a lot of the pre-pre-travel planning work comes into play. These are the more challenging tactics you have to take care of to make your vision a reality.

Some of it is about your mindset, some of it is about a shift in your behavior. All of it is coordination.

Get this part done and the rest is a breeze.

Homework

Yes!! I have the nerve to give you homework after you read through all of that.

I want you to write down your own G.O.S.T. and leave a comment below with your answer. This will serve as your very public accountability.

I’ll leave you a reply and offer some tips where appropriate. Can’t wait to see your vision for your solo self-care travel goals!

Share this post with a friend you’d love to see traveling as well.

Nov 10 2015

Why I Travel

Why do women travel solo?

We all travel for different reasons. One of the joys of meeting other women who travel solo or travel in groups is that our motives for taking “away time” for ourselves vary. Some women travel for adventure, some women travel for peace, some women travel for health, some for cultural immersion, some for service and some for food and wine. I like that last reason a lot! You get the point.

I’ve traveled solo to several countries by myself, either meeting up with a group or exploring on my own: Jamaica, Canada, England, Spain, Italy, Holland and more.

Aside from wanting quiet time, rest and relaxation, my adventurous spirit emerges. On my own, I seek to do more than usual compared to when I’m traveling with my family. I’m more open to meeting new faces and trying out new things.

Having a family doesn’t impede travel behavior but it also doesn’t make it easy for most moms to travel often on their own. This doesn’t mean that solo travel as a mother is impossible. I know several moms who travel solo for conferences or travel assignments.

Whatever the motivation for a woman traveling without her husband and kids, she has to have an “understanding” with her spouse.

The way we do it in my household is that he gets his trips and I get mine. And we try to take as many family trips as we do solo ones to balance the scale.

I’ve gotten a lot of questions from family and friends about why I travel so much by myself. Without them really knowing my circumstances or who I am at my core, it’ll be hard for them to understand.

Why I travel (solo)

The post below previously appeared on the Findery Blog and was published on Huffington Post Travel.

It’s been exactly one thousand one hundred and ninety three days since my 7-year-old was first diagnosed with leukemia. In June 2012 our lives took a dramatic turn, my role as a mother and a caregiver took on new meaning, and the reasons why I travel made a subtle shift.

Life’s Challenges

For the first thirty days after my son’s diagnosis, I stayed by his side, refusing to leave the hospital even for a short break. His bed was my bed. His diagnosis was my diagnosis. His bathroom was where I cried daily, wishing I could take the chemo for him to save his 4-year-old body from the violence it was enduring.

The induction period for a cancer patient is both physically and mentally grueling. For the parent of a pediatric patient, the pain manifests in a different way. It’s hard to deal when you’re helpless and have zero control.

When we finally moved back home, my husband and I agreed that I needed a little break. That first trip away revealed to me just how much continuing to travel was necessary for my well-being.

Traveling for Respite

In the first year of our leukemia journey, my soul, my mind, and my spirit desperately needed quiet time to find peace and re-charge. I confess to having a love-affair with the spa, however, my getaways weren’t just about getting a deep tissue massage. I traveled to several destinations where I didn’t give a single thought to laying in a treatment room. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not one to turn down a spa day, but it really isn’t my sole motivation for respite travel.

My mother used to say, “When you think you’ve got it bad, there’s always someone who has it worse.” When I travel on my own, I’m not only able to take a deep breath but I’m also able to gain perspective.

Travel teaches you to be Grateful

Motherhood has not been easy. However, when I travel, I’m constantly reminded that others have it much worse.

Every day I count my blessings.

I am thankful that my son has survived. I’m also grateful that I have the good fortune to travel. Many families facing mounting medical bills whether for cancer or autism are limited when it comes to long-distance or overseas trips.

During my travels, I’ve met people who’ve lost children. I’ve flown on planes with moms who looked like they needed a break. I’ve passed by locals selling items on the side of the road. And I’ve chatted with cab drivers yearning to travel the world.

I take note of each of these encounters. They’re reminders to be grateful. Life might not always be pretty, but, through these little moments, I can appreciate what I have. And travel makes me happy. When I return home, I’m more centered, relaxed, and patient.

The challenges are still there. Those don’t go away, but because I practice self-care travel it gives me an opportunity to fill up my cup for life’s obstacles and the responsibilities of motherhood.

My new mission

I want to empower moms to view travel as a form of respite as well.

Traveling for respite doesn’t preclude that you have personal circumstances as extreme as mine. I don’t think you need a dramatic reason if you’re a mom. The modern-day mom has so many pressures that the occupation alone is reason enough to take a time-out.

And for the mom who isn’t interested in traveling solo, there’s a growing number of us in the travel space creating travel communities for each other.

We’re diverse, unapologetic, cultured, educated, and redefining the Supermom narrative by taking our breaks. And holding each other up while we take them.

“It takes a village to raise a child.” And most of that village is made up of women.

Why do you travel solo? Do you have a favorite list of destinations you’d like to explore by yourself? Are you interested in traveling with a group of like-minded female travelers or do you prefer just one travel partner or none?

Sound off. I’d love to hear your thoughts below.

Oct 21 2015

The Reason Why I Travel Solo

I love traveling with my family but I also travel solo. This post originally appeared on Findery.com and on the Huffington Post. In the video, I discuss why my reasons for traveling solo shifted. Take a visual journey with me through Costa Rica to see how the landscape of a country can help support your wellness needs when you travel.

Nov 25 2013

Traveling Solo On The Carnival Sunshine

Carnival cruise line is known industry-wide as the fun ship, the boat for vacationers looking for budget-friendly cruises and a party. The company embraces and lives up to its’ name. I have a lot to say about the ship and its renovations but right now I want to tell you about what it’s like traveling solo on the Carnival Sunshine.

On my last Carnival vacation, I cruised with a friend to the Caribbean. This time around I traveled solo, an experience I never thought I’d have, yet a product of being a travel writer. Apprehensive at first, what I can say after six days in a cabin by myself is that it was an absolute delight. I’ve learned that a cruise isn’t a bad way to get some A+ quiet time.

The Carnival Sunshine provides a fun experience even for solo travelers. The inaugural sailing from New Orleans is one to be remembered. From crew members to passengers, everyone on board exuded excitement and genuine friendliness. Part of this could be due to the allure of the new ship and part of it could be to the fact that most of the people were from the Gulf Coast and nearby states, where generally speaking, people tend to be pretty friendly. I think overall everyone was happy to be there. That’s what vacation should be about anyway.

What struck me most about the Sunshine, in comparison to other Carnival ships that I’ve been on, is that the ship never felt over-crowded. Even with 15% more cabins and party-goers everywhere, there were still ample places to “hide”.

Two of my favorite places, other than when I was off the ship exploring, were the Library Bar where I could bring a book or borrow one in the ship’s collection. The self-serve wine machine was pretty cool, efficient and innovative. All you needed was your Sign and Sail card to have a glass dispensed for you, whether it was a taste for $3 or a full glass for $8. No waiting for a bartender necessary.

My other favorite place was the Cloud 9 Spa. The spa had three thermal suites, a sauna, two rain showers, heated tile-covered lounge chairs overlooking the sea, and a separate relaxation area for guests to enjoy. Even with the spa being “full” on the last sea day, I never felt claustrophobic or like I was bumping elbows with anyone.

The Sunshine underwent a $155 million renovation to transform itself from the Carnival Destiny to its new identity. It’s the first ship to do a refurb of this nature. Talk about recycling. The ship has twenty new branded-spaces – in addition to an expanded gym, a larger spa and an adults-only Serenity deck, completely on the opposite side of the ship away from the new consolidated kids’ area.

A wide range of dining options are available. The general Lido area, two dining rooms, four restaurants, and three other food stations including Guy Fieri’s Burger Joint ensured there were enough dining choices so that cruisers never got bored with the menu. I ate dinners with other press members and on sea days took my lunch in the room while I worked, the deli being my go-to spot for lunch.

Overall, my vacation on the Sunshine gave me options, exactly what any traveler wants. To sum it up, key things to do solo: the spa, the Library bar, the gym, exploring the ship, shopping. I could relax in a quiet space, dine with the masses, or party through the night, all on the same vacation and within the same day.

Disclosure: I was a guest of Carnival Cruises to preview the Sunshine. I was not compensated for this post, all opinions expressed are my own.

Aug 11 2013

Traveling Solo With Kids: Managing Travel As A Single Parent

The blog has experienced an uncharacteristic length of silence because I’ve been in constant adjustment to managing a travel lifestyle as a single parent. Since my husband‘s work has taken him overseas a few months ago, I’ve had to get accustomed to traveling solo with kids. It’s not the first time that I’ve had to taken on single parent travel but the circumstances have changed – the kids are older, mommy is older, and life is more hectic in our home.

Managing a household, a business, two young boys, fitness, and travel has been inexplicably difficult. I’ve been faced with some challenges throughout my life but this is one that I can’t pick up a book and read about. Single-entrepreneurial-travel-traithlete-special needs-cancer management-motherhood hasn’t been published yet. I’m living out the chapters on a daily basis.

So why don’t I give up the travel thing? Two reasons, it’s my livelihood and it keeps me sane.

However, that sanity doesn’t come without a headache. It takes a bucket of coordination with other people outside my household (along with an inherent dependency), whether it’s family to watch the boys when I need to travel solo, or a nanny to accompany me when I need the extra set of hands for a family trip.

This past week, I took my 15 year old nephew with us for the first time and we road tripped to the Laurel Highlands and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The 4.5 hour drive with a 5, 9, and 15 year old was more pleasant than I’d expected. I love when my boys surprise me. I even surprised myself! I followed all the tips that I leave for families on my blog, tips like:

Use a packing list.
Dole out responsibilities to any able-bodied person.
Leave at a strategic hour.
Take your time and don’t rush to get to the destination if you can help it.
Pack plenty of snacks, toys, and devices.
Factor in those very important driving breaks every two to three hours.
Get a good night’s sleep the evening before.
Focus on the journey as much as you do the destination.

If there’s one thing that I’ve learned from the trip that I’d say is consistent with the obstacles I face in my life, it’s that there’s always a beginning, middle, and end. My goals should always be to live in the moment and focus on where I’m at.